well...

things are not goin fine between me n mat nor. watever is wrong wit him i also dunnoe. he is being super dooper emotional. n i jz cant tolerate with such behaviour. tried calling jeff but cant get thru. ive been setting n telling myself to always think the positive n throw away the negative tots tt i have. maybe he have to settling sth over there which is very much important than calling n inform me.

haiyah. iryan called me, n told me tt he already misses me.

well i miss u too..

i knew i have to..

back from hibernating. well i simply dunnoe wat to update in here coz wat i went thru was undescribable. i spent the whole week wit iryan. we totally pampered ouselves wit high class treatment. it was the heaven's week i told ya. n ive received pretty comments coz i dressed up head to toe for the whole week. everyday after job, we met, had luxurious dinner. n chill under the moonlight. and talk n share some stuffs. went for ear candling. he treated me to hair relaxer at vidal sassoon salon.

before he left for the flight on friday morning, we had our wee hours dinner cum supper n early breakie at dylan's mansion. n now tt house was totally empty n abandoned for good. leaving the good n bad memories behind. i was touched when i saw my baby skatie was still hanging on his blue wall. left untouched. a whole stretched of donna karen's and levi's watch owned by dylan. my board shorts . rip curl n roxy board shorts n flip flops, was there all these while collecting dust. our travelling suit case louis vuiton was inside his computer room. his iMAC n lappie was also left untouched. it was all abandoned wit no fingerprints. undisturbed.

yan took dylan's skate shoes. shorty n dc. coz he was told to take it. i told him to bring along my deck so he can always rmb me. but he said its too pain to bring it along coz he cant afford to carry the burden of missing me. awwww! tts so sweet of him. i saw my gucci hand bag. the one wit black n gold lining. i rmb i only wore it once for his function at hyatt hotel. it was too grand, n it wasnt really an informal flavour. tot of bringing my deck along. but i jz cant take it off the wall, coz it wud then be very bare. n there will be no more connections between me n him anymore if i were to step into tt house again. insya allah.

his boss n ferrari perfume was still brand new. n his polo was half filled. when we entered his walk in wardrobe, i felt tt im being surrounded n hugged by dylan. his tuxedo, shirts, tees, school uniforms..beanie, shorts, pants, shoes. haversack. all was so damn perfect. i cried. coz i tink im starting to miss him so bad. yan managed to control n console me. there hanging on his wardrobe wall was our portrait. it was siliconed to the wall. n its fixed.

haiz. theres lots to mention. i need to breathe....

i miss u

so saturday after work, took cab with farhana, hada and mai to nuran's place. i was too tired to take bus. coz i was rushing. n i cant rush. once i rush, i'll drain myself inside out. everything was perfect for nuran on tt day. she was looking seriously gorgeous and so-sweet-kencing-manis. she wore this gold kebaya n gold veil. ahh love it on her!

i have to leave early. leaving my lesbos behind coz i have to droped by my aunt's place. have matters to discuss n it went perfectly a-ok. after met them, i have to leave also coz im meeting the bunchies. ya. like ive mentioned in the earlier entry.

n so moon fetched me under void deck. the moment i stepped into his car, he told me sth in which really excites me.

'eh beb, kekasih lama ko join kitorang sume tau. anjat boboy! ku nak gi pick up die skg. ko teka ar sape eh beb...'

so i was like guessing all the way. trying to re-call who the hell my ex tt they noe n click so well. n have to be fetch summore. i was thinking all the way untill when it reaches to this particular area, looked very familiar, n i was like...

'MOON! IRYAN SHAH JOIN KITE?? IRYAN AKU???!!!'

moon n yana n khai was like shouting "hell yeah!!"

so u can imagine la eh how happy i was. how excited i was at tt period of time. when we reached his nenek's house, he's already under the void deck. smoking. i was so so so so happy. n tt was the time when i realised tt i forgot to bring my digi along. coz i tot its onie the usual us. so no need to bring la. when moon stopped the car, i opened n ran to him, he welcomed me wit open arm. n i hugged him!

hehe. i was floating when i was in his arm. he smell nice. n i looked at him. he is so handsome. nth change. except for his hair. longer n silky smooth. n the fringe is killing me i say. sooooo cute....!

believe it or not, im wit him the whole nite. we spent the whole nite talking n sharing. n when its time to go, he gave one last hug n kiss me good nite. haiz.

n now. i miss him so bad..

to blog meaning to release tension

huh. but no i dun tink im tension rite now. well apparently rite now im not in a mood to finish up my playgroup lesson plan week 4. n i have my tree of fame n teachers info board still waiting for me. it was given to me a few hrs ago n the due is tmrw. so yeah. tmrw then i'll start doin it. well i hate repeating this but then, u cant simply rush a perfectionist.

i have mothers day n SLC craft to submit. soon i guess. ouh n not forgetting the report book remarks. n ya the one tt they are chasing for is tt assembly slides for term 3 week 3. due by week 4. n apart from this busy-ness, i havent start practicing my still life drawing n painting. design im not really worried as tt paper was the most easy. n ive yet to buy my literature text n IRK book. so many pending yet so little time.

can i just vanish?

the bunchies moon suddenly called me n asked if im free this sat. too bad im not. im working. then i have to rush to nuran's wedding. cant wait for it actually. then maybe, just maybe, i wanna mit my Along n Abah. need to discuss some matter. n insya allah, meeting Bell. so its kinda hectic. they said they're having gathering at tunnel. there i am, talking to moon, in the bus, heading towards home from work, talking 'bout tunnel. tt matrip beside me was looking at me one kind. i din realise tt he actually was looking at me in awe. realised when i took a glance at him. when he saw me looking at him, he jz looked away n say out loud, 'tunnel sia!'

so? cannot go is it? u tink the tunnel tt im talking about is tt tunnel is it? pergh! but i ignored him anyway. underage guys arent suppose to be entertain. n so we continued the conversation. i begged him to change the venue. coz i dun wanna step into there anymore. scared tt i mite bump into him like last time. i had enuff. n also scared tt i mite get addicted to it. n so we agreed. to meet up at al-falah.

hehe kiddin' la. we decided to meet up at sheikh's place. since his mom kept on asking bout me, n so ya la we're goin to sheikh's. the whole of bunchies coming. bt too bad la fik not joining. he said he got sth on which we're not told. but i cant confirm wit them yet coz i mite be dead n cold n buried by the time i meet them. after the wedding n just IF i meet bell, im gonna be totally shag. drain.

ouh well..

tmr im goin geylang wit ibu. wanna buy shoe n do lil shopping. wanna treat her at Di Tanjong Katong. if she wants la. jz hope she dun choose at haig rd or sth la. i dun even noe if haig rd still exist.

i was pondering over some stuffs which sets me to think. n i was gob-smacked. wish not to elaborate anything further. ouh n ya. i broke my promise to fee. sowie gerlfren. at first i asked for her opinion if i shud msg n wish him his 21st b'day but she told me to forget it. dun even try to think bout it. but i did it. i msg-ed him at the very last hour. 5 minutes before 10 pm if im not mistaken. hehekz. i was just tempted to do it la. then after a few minute, he asked who is this. n i simply ignore it. coz the main reason was tt, to wish him bday n tts all. n i did.

my arm still hurt from the accident i had a few days ago. nth really serious tho. jz minor bumps n scratch. im loosing my power. toodles for now.

rmb, dun do drugs. peace to war. \w/

everything is so unpleasent this few days.
n its very very demoralising.

im back.. *yawn*

n im still tired lor. cant start doin anything seh. too tired.

ok ok. a few approached i got when i reached the entrance of the mosque. apart from osman welcoming me n introduce me to the chickas. oopps. to the beliawanis.

" eh u look very familiar eh? do we noe each other?"

"u the one budak madrasah kat sini kan dulu. the one hu never tok."

"eh hie. at last we got to meet kan. kalau tak we're onie in each other friendster list of frens je eh."

"eh u look soooo tired. come have a sit. come i take for u the drinks. eh come i bring u to where we shud keep ur bag pack. eh come solat maghrib. eh come la this..come la that..."

n the most which i seriously cannot tahan is....

"huda, how long u n osman da kawan eh? rapat ngan die? mcm maner bleh rapat? kenapa sampai boleh jadi besfren? ouh abih penah klua ngan die? sape suruh dtg sini eh? osman ke? masih contact eh ngan osman? eh u kenal kan ex osman yg nama ni, ni, ni, tu, tu, tu? osman die gini gini gini kan? die mmg gitu, gitu, gitu."

EH ALAMAK. I SERIOUSLY CANT STAND HER!.

i knew her very long time la. she ever approached me last time at frenster n asked me the same thing all 'bout osman. n at tt time, i n him baru baru nak close la. she bombared me wit so many qns seh. smp kan osman tlg settle kan. abih ni lagi. osman jz told me to ignore. n ya i did.

ni mesti kes berkenan ngan osman. hahahaha!

kk overall tt thing was EUREKA! it was nicely done altho theres hassle here n there. but everything went perfectly smoothly. no doubt the tiredness is unbearable la. n i looked very very very pale k. the moment i reached home, my mom was so shocked to see me so white n puffy n sleepy n errrggh! ugly!

k back from MIA.
well wasnt really MIA. but things are just really gettin tied up. my schedule this weekend can strangle me to death. ytd apparently i went to the briefing coz my very besfren osman made me go to the briefing. it sounded really important. lucky my dad wasnt working so i made him drive me all the way to en-naeem. my used-to-be madrasah back then. it was like half way collapsing i tell u. since the day i left en-naeem, till now theres no big changes.

we had the briefing in one of the many containers. met some old folks but there were'nt really any interactions tho. onie a few rmb me by the camp a few yrs ago. peeps like the huzaifah n ramdan n shahrizam noes n rmb me. surprisingly sambri my pri skool mate was there too. hes one of the geek wit the bike la. no doubt osman oso la. so i was told tt im the station master. n will be at esplanade. wit a few other chicks n geeks. k this thing actually like the ala ala amazing race liddat la. from one area travel wit bicycle to certain part. from eastern to the northen. fort canning la. hong lim park la. malay village la. muis la. tt kind of thing la. n this activity happens at friday nite. cool aye?

cool habis..

ppl like me wont get a wink to sleep k. rite after the curriculum presentation, i have to straight away report to en-naeem, n get ready for the opening event @9.30pm. the 'intifada' group will do the opening. nama nak step style eh. these are the the geeks wit the bikes. well they arent really a geek la. hehekz. so hit straight to patillas. after the opening thingy, we the station masters will be driven all the way to our own stations n get ready to it. n we approximately target tt by the time reach my station, it wud be roughly at 3 am liddat. AM k.

so can imangine la eh on sat i report to work wit shagged puffy looking face. tt is so not gonna work man.. last group roughly we target wud be 7. n i tink by tt i'll b rushing to work lor. i dunnoe if i cud make it or not. insya allah la eh. haiyah. ni semua osman nyer pasal la. kesian kan kawan BAIK pe pasal...

ouh n i misses jepp so much. altho last mon i met him. i made him asked for halfday from his work so i cud meet him n had movie marathon. coolness! watched all those movies. wahahah! but the thing tt i dun like watching movies wit him is tt, not him comforting me from the coldness, but me have to comfort him. die cepat sejuk la beb! haiyah. syg tunang nye pasal. oopps! bakal tunang nye pasal...

wahahahah! there me go blabber bout tt shit again. haiyah!! n ive jz received an email from hyrul anuar! HAHAHAHAHH coolness! k shuddup to those who called or labelled him kepit ke ape ke. i dun give a damn. for all i care im happy he emailed me. wat izzit about??

MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS LA WEI!!

heheks. kk taking care. i have to do my lesson plan la. totally crapness~