Dearest Muhd Khairi Bin Muhd Nor,

You are the love of my life. My life has been extremely perfect since the day you appeared. Thank you for being there for me all this while. Without you, I felt so insecure before. I need you to lead the way and guide me to the right path.

I still remember, the first time, when you looked at me in the eye and told me that you love me. I told myself, "Yes. He's the one." And I still do hope, till now, that you will always be the one for me. We went through many ups and downs together. All the hardships and countless arguments, painful memories that we shared and gone through shoulder to shoulder be it mentally, emotionally or even financially, still, we survived.

Just so you know, I still do have butterflies in my stomach each time you run your finger down from my veil to my sleeve. Your soft touch never fails to melt my heart and your voice will always make me feel so secure.

Thank you for being patient towards my emotional crisis. I appreciate it alot and theres no other words for me to describe this gratitude that I have for you. Please do remember, that I am loving you with all my heart and soul. No one can take you away from me, except Him.

"Uhibbuka Daa'iman"

I ran today. Right after Maghrib. I dragged my bro along to accompany and motivate me. I have such a lovely brother. He ran with me. He said all the nice words to me just to make sure I won't stop running. I felt so light. Next running date will be this Wednesday. I promise I won't procrastinate.

exactly 3 more days to 500.
waiting patiently..

Finally, it happened. After so much procrastinations.

• Cammie Lesson 1 by Sayang, DONE.
• Visit Botanical Garden with Sayang, DONE.
• Understand camera settings and aperture, DONE.
• Capture the moments using the Manual mode, DONE.

And the most important one of all, the lesbos, like finally. We met and had a good laugh. If only we can afford to have a great time like this as often as possible.

Love.

Sayang made me read an entry by his friend, Zuraimi.( http://qalaqalbi.wordpress.com/) And I feel that I should share it with my loyalties here. It is worth reading. If you're not in a relationship, no worries. Read it with an open mind. Perhaps, for future sake. Here goes..

Every relationship has a cycle.

In the beginning, you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love isn’t hard. In fact, it is a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You don’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.
People in love sometimes say, “I was swept off my feet.” Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU. Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfilment. Extramarital fulfilment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it. I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this): The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And mos importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner). Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know and apply these laws, the results are predictable. Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO!!

I went through a Dejavu. Back to the year when we were so close together,once upon a time.
At first, I thought, I can't survive. I might suffocate and choke myself to death. But, Alhamdulillah, it went perfectly normal and well. Eventhough there we some weird quietness in the beginning, especially during the Journey to Lavender. I had to sleep as I suffer from motion sickness. If you need me to stay awake, then interact with me. Strike a conversation with me. But, we chose to do our own stuffs, ended up, me dose off with MP3 accompanied me and her, scrutinising her mobile. When we reached the City Hall, just a slight nudge and I'm back to reality. There was an awkward silence all the way to the food court. Somehow, I'm glad that it happened. On my way, I kept on smiling and looked at her from behind. What went wrong? I don't wish to recall. There are reasons to all the things that happened. And I'm glad once again, then things, are somehow, getting to be like it used to. I was touched when u actually agreed with the choice that I made for you when u asked for my opinion. We went on seperate ways and that's how we ended the day.

Will this ever happen again? IMY.

it breaks my heart when you leave me with a sad and gloomy face.
it breaks my heart when your eyes welled up with your tears.
i then realise that i can be a potential heart-breaker.
a potential trouble-maker.
and a potential useless being.

maybe, tts what practically im good at.
I shud run to the highest floor and just jump down.
maybe, just maybe, im good at it too.

don't save me if i fall.
just let it be...

I am lucky to have a wonderful boyfriend. who seriously and truly understand my interest.
Sayang, I am really looking forward for the Ilsa Tari on this Sunday at NUS.

Anyway, Maisara tingkat 4 kirim salam semua.