im like so in love wit the song unfaithful by rihanna.

venue: in the bus service 39, on the way meeting khai.

a very long time fren asked me,

zul: "huda, u still with him? alah the one tt look like achik la. smile so cute one.."

n the moment he said the one tt smile like achik, it was none other than my ex boyfren azmy la.

me: "oh u mean azmy eh? wahliao long time oready i broke off wit him. y wats up?"

it was really awkward lor reminiscing the old stories..

zul: "just wondering la. like 2 years already i din get any news from u since im away. before i left, u guys are like the couple of the year like dat. very the unseperable. always side him no matter wat.."

i smiled to myself. those days. heh. actually wat he said was true. almost everything about him is always rite eventho the mistake was very clear to be seen.

zul: "wat happen ya to the both of u? dun tell me the same thing happened la. u guys survive 5 mths of separation onie. after tt, patched things up again. until i left."

me: " apparently wat happened was the same thing. he left me for another girl. in which a better one la i think. hes happy now tts wat i noe for sure la. hehe"

tts a fake laugh i tell u..

zul: " serious ar huda? y is tt so? n yet u still can smile eh? eh, baik sgt la hati u nie.."

ahh tts the most common comment ive always received. too soft hearted.

zul: " did u cry? i mean when he asked for it? did u cry? gave him one tite slap?"

i looked down. n wit low voice..

me: " tt time, he asked me thru fone. a week before we broke off, tt is a few more days before raya, he admitted tt he got really bored n sick n tired wit me. n he met someone whom he think is rather much worth to be with. nah i din cry. i managed to control. i dun wan ibu n ayah to find out tt we broke off for the second time."

i said in one go.

me : "n eversince he told me tt he dun love me anymore, he treated n giving me cold shoulders. at certain time, e wud spent his nite toking to the new gerl rather then toking to me like he always do."

i dunnoe y it was so simple for me to say out everything tt was used to be so saddening n painful for me.

zul: "serious? wahliao. daring eh. i mean, yeah la he was a brave guy to say like that to a gerl who was his gf at tt period of time. fookkedingtiang sia~"

i smiled.

me: "ala zul, tt was a long time story la. i mean no use toking bout it anymore. he is now very happie to the max with his gerl rite now, the one whom he left me for. i mean i dun hold anymore grudges."

zul: " there are times u miss him rite?"

i was like looking rite into his eyes. n looked down.

zul: " come on la huda. eact time we dropped by tamp interchange, u get really kanchiong. then if we to take bus service 39, pass by his house, u will take a look for a few seconds at his window. like jz now. u take a look at it rite? dun bluff me la. i knew u much longer then he met u.."

tears starts to welled in my eye. the tears filled up to its brim. then it flows down to my cheek.

zul: " im sorrie i brought up this topic. but wats past is past k. dun worry. theres always someone better who is waiting for u. smile. u noe, ur smile is the most interesting n captivating bout u. ur smile can make someone's heart melt ya noe. esp mine. nw, make my heart melt will u..?"

i looked at him. he wiped off my tears. i smiled at him n looked away.

************

i admitted sometimes i miss him. n i admitted, if im on my way to iman prcc, each time i passes by his house, i will take the oppurtunity to take a peep at his window. jz hoping tt maybe he will be looking out from the window. but never wud i have the chance. i admitted, im always kanchiong if im at tamp interchange on my way home from iman tamp.

haiyah. i made my mini confessions already.

this is so not rite. i must move on. all thanks to zul. ouh n btw, this zul here jz gt back from oxford university. one brilliant dude.

shoots. now im all teary again.

toodles loyalties.

I sit here, alone - with thoughts of you,
Sometimes confused - of what to do.
My mind has doubts - I can't deny,
So, I lay alone - alone to cry.
I feel my life - slip out of my hands
I feel all the stumbles - between the stands.
Tears drop down - after every blink
So, I long for distraction - I'm too scared to think.
When you're here - and by my side
I allow concentration - I no longer hide.
But when Solitude approaches - and catches me here,
I yearn for voices... for Silence, I fear...
I'm lost in the craving for conversation.
Vulnerable to time - overwhelmed by sensation!
I look to find - a bonding link.
Afraid of my thoughts - too scared to think.

|\"/|

wats tt sign suppose to mean anyway? i dunnoe. hehe. niways, salamz to all loyalties.

now then i have the free time like saying hello to all n update my bloggie. apologies ya coz ive been really really bz wit stuffs. u noe iMAN stuffs. the curriculum presentations la. the center visit la. then collectiong of crafts la. then now upcoming event is the open house thingy la. n it so happen tt im in the learning studio n theme board team la. so ya u noe wat i mean..

LA.

i dun mind some unknown readers or bloghopper came upon my blog. but let me tell u this clear. as wat was said by hafiz as'ari; this is my blog my way my mind my say, if u dun like it get out go away. ya. clearly n enuff said rite? stated rite up there in case u dun get it. well apparently i have stranger in my bloggie here n tagged tt i wrote fake entries. bloody hell. if all of my entries are fake, then wat are my frens for? are they fakers to? damn i must be drop dead stupid n idiotic then to have such frens who're like zombies.

then it says tt i im pathetic n in need of help desperately. i tink ure rite. currently im dealing n facing wit lots of unexpected stuffs n i do need help desperately. who r u to say such things to me? pathetic me? its none of ur business anyways. im deperately need help. u have any better idea on how to deal wit the stress tt im facing? if u dun have it, then keep ur comments to urself then. dun leave any discouraging or rude msg then. coz this is my PROPERTY. n its none of ur bloody stinking business~ me getting a life? ya ive been thinking bout this also. i need a life. coz ive been working like almost all the time. even my boifrens n gerlfrens n buddies said tt im working alot. like A LOT la kan. so yeah. thanks eh for being so observant.

get this thing straight, screw it in ur stinking narrow brain tt if u dun like it, leave it. if u dun like it, shut it. if u have anything against it, leave ur true name. so i noe n maybe, jz maybe, from there i can take ur words into consideration. anonymous or unidentified are truely immature. i onie entertain true self-declared kinda person. so nx time if u have anything against me, like my entries are fake la, i need help la. im seriously pathetic la n i literally need someone to wake me up la, do leave ur name (as stated in ur birth certificate) behind, so i noe who r u. okie?

*k dunded*

fik was truly disagree when i told him im goin to this sat gig wit "Ali" (not the real name as to hide the identity). he was completely against it. i mean not onie fik. but almost everyone. y? u peeps all have anything against him eh?

at least tell me lor. so i noe. he asked me out. he din actually force me. but he said, if i come wit him, everything will go pretty well as planned. n nth dirty or maluation gonna happen. fik said tt wat gonna happen will b like the most happiest thing gonna happen to me but not to him n the rest. so rite now, ive been wondering wat is this thing..

fik said he overheard the conversation n he dun like it. wat daaa~

marque, tlg aku marque.

WA SUA KENA TAGGED!

HAHA! ive been tagged by lesbo aidah. hmm i actually was taking a break from doin my taskcard. its torturous ( derive from the word torture ; so i hope u noe wat i mean. ) doin all this thing ya noe. u did it n suddenly they wan u to add on this la tt la. all those minor stuffs. haiyah. killing me. permanently damage ar my brain.

so ok la here is the tagging was all about..

3 schools I went to:
madrasah al-muttaqin, seranggon garden south school, mayflower secondary school

3 things in my handbag:
housekeys, purse, cell phone

3 things I do when I'm stressed:
drink mineral water, eat chocolate n istighfar..

3 places I go on a daily basis:
woodlands ring, woodgrove, woodlands ring

3 favourite fruits:
honeydew, apple, strawberry

3names I go by:
rul, yul, nur (actually i have like plenty of names tt ppl call me..)

3 of my favourite food:
my mom's chicken rice, my mom's chicken porridge n my mom's bubur lambuk!

3 things I'm wearing right now:
long pants, short blue blouse and specs (see wat happen when u dun go for regular eye check up after surgery..)

Who is in the house with me?
the usual except for my bro. hes sleeping over at opah's house.

Who am I thinking of right now?
plenty. i love thinking. apart from thinking bout iMAN stuffs. my adek farah. coz i jz read her blog n she mention Azmy. then suddenly i rmb yadali. then now its spreading like wat. all my crews n bunchies now is messin in my head. wad daa!

Who did I last talk to on the phone?
suhana sujak. she told me tt its pass twelve n its her birthday already. n she told me wat she wan for her bday prezzie. haiyah.

Who did I sit with during my 5th period in class?
i dun attend classes anymore. in the mean time la. at mfss used to be wit farah. tt siao ca bo gerl. then at JSB, wit bell 24/7. at NAFA, wit this cute guy named Aidil Sufiyan. so cute la he.

Who was the last person I uttered "LOVE" to?
noni sulastri.

Who do I wish I am right now?
a student. but too bad la im a teacher now.

Who gets on my nerves most in school?
principals n heads. n management. ooopsie!

Where is my phone?
phone as in house phone? rite beside me here. on my comp desk.

Where do I sleep?
in my room. duh!

Where is the place I took a ride to?
compass pt. met my aunt.

What was the last thing I ate?
yong tau foo n green tea

What colour shirt am I wearing?
its a blue BLOUSE.

What is the closest item to me that is blue?
ERR the blouse tt im wearing rite now..?!

What do I like most about school?
the colourful walls. n the hanging mobiles n art crafts.

What is my favourite colour?
u guys shud add plural to colour. well let me do it. COLOURS! hmm i have alot. altho u said its fav. blue black. white. brown. khaki colours. beige. dark brown. green. orange. purple.

What do I wear most often jeans or shorts?
Jeans. ya

What was the last movie I watched?
the omen. 666. dumb movie!

When did I start school?
1992. ya straight away to K2. brilliant me.

When did I last go to the Mall?
jz now. compass pt is a mall rite..?


When did I last burn something?
err none.

3 bloggers to do this:
ahh ive beent thinking bout this eversince i started reading lesbo aidah's tag. i cant be asking lesbo fee to do it coz shes been tagged by aidah. so im gonna tag ADEK FARAH, DIANA EUSOP and NADIYAH SUHAIMI!

im gonna make sure they do this taggy. i wanna asked hyrul anuar, tp takot buang karen la kan. n ive realised tt i have LOADS of frens, n onie a few do have blog. peeps like the cres n bunchies eh, they dun blog. so ya la, fee n aidah, tenggelam la hasrat krg nak marque la, fik la kena tag eh.

aitez. i tink i have enuff rest already. its time for me to continue wit task cards n family fun kit. daaaa!

one big family here..

another bunch of eager ppl..



will continue wit more pics. i have to call hakim now. daaa!

yesssssaaa im backkk!

uh-huh. im back im back. from bangkok. sowie for not udating for quite some time already. been really bz n extremly exhausted wit the reading clinic camp. after im done wit tt camp, i have to prepare for the trip. tts y theres a long silence.

bangkok was super dooper fun. it was true la as to those who called bangkok was a shopping heaven. u cant resist it. u sill tend to shop almost everything. n plus, u have to be really good when it comes to bargain. they can screw u down wit the price if u dunnoe how to bargain actually. well i was one of them tt got screwed. it was the first day n we went to pakpong for the first shopping, (its a red light district if u noe wat i mean) so i decided to get my bro n dad's stuffs. so tot of butying them a belt. the one tt has levis or armani buckle. me being very stupid when it comes to bargain. the price was 700 baht. n i onie bargain for 500 baht. 1 belt for 20 singapore dollars. bloody hell! i din realise it at first. it was when a fren of mine who asked how much i bought it. i told her i paid 1000 baht for 2 belts. n she shrieked! she said i cud get 300 baht for 2 belts. i was down the whole nite. i felt like as thought my stomach had juz risen up to my throat.

eversince tt incident, i have no mercy towards them when it comes to bargaining. die die i start my bargain as low as 200 baht. no doubt la some threw their calculators when i pinned 200 when i was asked how much i wan it. but some really had patience wit me. hehe. im being very reasonable ya. tts not original n ure selling me at a very high price. mite as well i buy the original one. puas hati ryt!

n summore im not the type tt wear all those bedek stuffs. so i din buy much of my stuffs. i do shop but most of the things are the one tt kirim. i did bought handbag but its more of the tribal ones. not all those brengset ones. so i bought leather slippers, brown tribal handbag, another handbag, a shirt n the list shall goes on. majority are my relative's stuffs. coz the brand tt im looking for wasnt there. like adidas la. guess la. they are more of the kakak kakak n makcik makcik brand. those chloe la. fendi la. plenty la.

i will upload the pics soon. coz im goin out soon. to have lunchie. daaaa!

im gooooooonnnnna cooooooook todaaaaayy! yesssaaaa!!!

ya like after so long already. today im gonna cook ar. simple yet the most favourite. its the favourite chicken soup wit carrot n potato. aites.

bought for myself harry potter n the order of phoenix. ya ya i noe im kinda late. but well, its better be late then never rite. altho ive read the da vinci code, but still i need to get tt book. i need to read for the....4th time. ya. coz its interesting tts y.. before tt met along n abah. out for lunch. planned to eat at sakura downtown east. but when we reached there, it was close n will onie open for dinner. so we were all like broken hearted. almost dead for both me n sis as we din have anything for breakfast. so im like dragging my feet. we ended up at some indian restaurant. me being not favour for indian food, i got for myself a cheese naan n fish takki. a grilled fish. so ya. after tt, dropped by causeway pt, bought some stuffs then head home.

now im gonna start cooking!!!