k i have announcement to make loyalties. pls settle down. sit straight and dun slouch.

rite.

on tuesday, i was called to come into the office. and mdm spoke to me. and on thursday morning she broke the news. and on thursday evening debriefing, lesbo fee broke another news. so wats the news im talking about?

exactly after 2 years and 4 mths with iMAN, after many experiences in handling big major events, after many things that i have to go through, after all the thick and thin..

iMAN promoted me to Senior Teacher for Woodgrove. and not onlie dat, i was promoted to K2 Harvard and PG Kingston. Kudos to me!

y my entry so formal leh.. make it easy can?

and so ya loyalties, ive been promoted. now im responsible for all the things that lesbo fee used to. ohh, and she was promoted to the Head Teacher for Woodgrove. Euphoria for her!

and literally i shud be happy rite with the promotions and the hand over of stuffs, but deep down inside my heart, im feeling lonely.

1) the fact that family is leaving tonite for a holiday cum ibu bday celebration.

2) a change of teaching partner. a major changes to be exact. back to independent me. used to be pampared by the ustazah and a very useful partner.

3) jay making me jealous by going out wit a gerl for a movie "ninja turtle" despite the fact that he claimed when i overheard his conversation on a fone when we went out the other time, saying that ninja turtle is effing lame and boring. when i offered to watch movie, he said he was cashless, i offered to treat him but he rejected. and now a week after, he said hes at the cinema watching that "effing lame and boring" movie. he said k.

wth.

shims said i shudnt have this kinda feelings as he isnt my bf. he have the liberty to go out wit everyone. and after much logical thinking, i tink, i shud let him go.

shud stop thinking bout him.

shud stop bothering him.

shud stop msg him like he will be be n forever be mine.

shud stop everything that is linkage to Abdul Jalil.

but bestie osman asked, will be able to stop. or worse IGNORE? he just knew me too well la. i called him n consult him. i cried and he actually coax me. so sweet of him.

i shud concentrate on someone else.

i shud like give chance to others.

i shud like try to accept yadh's existence. (im trying my very best in this...)

i shud priotise my work! and children! and the new responsibilities! and to the family! (thats the most important thing!)

yeah i shud. so no more pwince. no more heart. we shall just see la k.








help me can?

It's All About Him!

i love this week. well despite the fact that im down with sore eyes, but wt i like so much about is that, i met jay thrice this week! hell im gonna miss him sooo bad when he started his temp job at vivo.

kk i so cant wait to blog bout him. its all about him k.

hehe the training cum curriculum meeting that i had at tamp was the first of everything. not the first time i met him or wat la but the first time of this epidemic meet up. but tt was just awhile meet up onie coz seeing me half dead, dragging my feet meeting him, so he decided i shud just head home straight. i was kinda dissappointed la kan coz gt to mit up a while onie. but we manage to share lame jokes and chit chat and went for early light dinner.

so we shall skipped wat happen the nx day as u noe i was down wit sore eyes!

n so on thurs i din go for my tarian prac as it still sores. the redness was reduce but the watery watery just wont stopped. i ended up at sengkang after the tuition. well kak su demand to have the tuition not worrying bout my conditions. n i overnite at sengkang. watched muvie and slept late. tt actually worsen the eye condition u see as i have to squint my eyes and because of that i was called, cina bukit sesat.

thanks la eh.

n so on fri, after lunch, jay msg-ed n complained cum sympathy-seeker saying that hes alone at vivo. his intentions was to looked ard at his werk place but he din noe its gonna be tt bored. he was hinting la and i sardinely ask, if he needed me to accompany. gatal la plak kan. slamat la mata da baik coz my nenek did sth to it before i went to bed the previous nite. it was shimmery shimmery wen i woke up la kan.

and so we spent the time together at vivo. classic i tell u. i like how the thing goes la kan. i shall not go in detail on tt. coz im scared later u ppl mite have the sore eyes.. wakaka!

and so sat hmm.. i went jb wit family. still on mc la kan. so bought few stuffs at jb. and slept late. we had movie marathon. and on sun, today to be exact, i woke up kinda early coz gt tuition. i was sent and fetched and i felt like a princess totally. later in the evening, met up wit him again at boon lay. this time to pass the card that partner aidah ordered from him. im freaking jealous coz its freaking gorgeous k.

he decided to meet me today after his kendarat coz he said he mite be bz as hes starting to werk temp at vivo. we chatted. we had great laugh. we discussed on wedding bands. kental la kan kite nie. n i told him tt i like my bridal dais to have swings decorated wit umbrellas and all. n he actually sekaki by saying that this bridal service do provide this kinda set up.

im so gonna love him to bit.

but one thing i dun like bout him, KATA DIA, KATA DIA LA. DEGIL NAK MAMPOZ.

i tink tts wat guys are about rite?

and guess who i saw??! my bestie osman! hes in CD now fyi. hehe. kekek la. coz i was like kutuk all the mat CD tt passed us by at mrt, jay also joined in k, and there my own bestie is one of them. haha.

and aku rasa entry da bo chap. ni la akibat kalau update bila ngah kelam kabut.

k la so long peeps.

k time to update. less noise please. ppl. behave.

wat onie. haha.

niways, heloo to all loyalties. sowie for a very long time period of quietness and hibernation. well u cant rush a perfectionist. u noe i have to go thru lots of hassle and lots of decision making ya noe. so like exactly now then i can have a breather. so excuse me can?

hehe.

ppl said im demanding. wat la sey demanding? can dun judge me without knowing me well? lesbos..am i demanding? well lets make a point then, if wat i demand for is logical, then ya la thats besides the point rite? i mean, the topic here now that we're debating now is sooo irrelevant can?! i am not supposed to update about this stupid thing la seh. i shud like update wat happen to me recently..

pergh!! *smacks forehead*

niways, daily now, i made myself run with i dunnoe how many rounds. and i made the effort to go to the gym despite my hectic schedule. and just ytd i made myself do the payback. i was down wit sore eyes la! i woke up with so many shits on my eyes, n literally i cant open my eyes. so i tot another prank that my bro did to me. so i was like a blind mice walking towards the toilet to get ready for the rest of the day. i emptied my bowels and wash the face just so that i can open my eyes and see my beautiful morning face.

n so i grabbed my facial seaweed cleanser from body shop (unpaid self-promo! kiuk!kiuk!) and did the usuals and ya la i dun have to go into details la kan. but i can tell u, the sores in the eyes was unbearable la kan n i tot the foam got into my eyes. n so i dried myself up. while i was drying my hair i decided to look at the mirror.

BLOODY HELL!

n it was sure bloody red i tell u. my eyeballs are freaking red la sia! i shrieked! no i cant shout as that will awaken everybody else and i dun wan that to happen. n so i was like a mad cat now, ran out from the toilet and search for my cell and texted fee.

fee! i got sore eyes! my eyeballs are red!!

and u noe wat she replied? very simple.

waduh2.

waaaaa. i was like wat the hell am i supposed to do. kanchiong la kan as i rarely have this eyesore thingy. usually its the diarrhoea or migrain or fever or asthma onie. now it involves the eye tau. so i woke the sister up..

dik..mata aku sakit. aku ada sore eyes. macam maner nie...?

she bo layan la sia. i was urggh!

so i texted fee, mdm n nuran telling them i need to see the doc.

n guess wat i did the whole day after the visit to the clinic? i slept the whole day la seh. wat i planned for the whole day really goes down to the drain. i onie woke up just in time for the dancefloor. tt one oso i have to like hug the tissue box and kept on wiping the tears off my eyes.

damn irritating. i wud rather have diarrhoea then sore eyes. very sore-ful ya noe wat i mean? hehe.

woohooo!

like finally my blog will be update. hehe thanks to lesbo for the changes. i love it this way. very the myself.

niways, theres lots of things happening ard me. i shall not say it wat issit as it will be a lengthy one i tell u. just a lil brief of it.

goodness! i dun even noe where to start! lests starts wit lesbos fee's bday. hehe full update on it wit pics and everything, click to Aidah linkies. she full update about it. n i spent alot on her this yr. we shall make it big for the Aidah oso this yr. just make sure shes not out of town like last yr.

ohh now. exactly like rite now, herman is like confronting me. how come i went all silence and din call him anymore.

do i have to justify on dat?

well my instinct said, relax sua. haha.

ok ok. me n yadh doin super dooper fine. dunnoe when this thing will last. but apparently, we're doin perfectly a-ok. me and heart plak, oso doin absolutely fine. we're meeting very often more than u noe. its all about art, dancing and tailoring. yeah its goody goody ubber fun when u have the same head into sth. i like the things that goin on btwn us.

i'll be werking till wed. n im meeting heart at tamp. after training. and tmr im werking. the afternoon shift. for the open house la wat else. dunch u read papers?

niways, i wanna congratulate my sister, Adik FARAH! she make it to Innova JC and do MLEP. hehe congrats dek. we will mit soon. tts a promise. the present is like tangkap habuk k. haha.

actually i have lots of things to blog about but its just tat im all occupied now and its rather hectic i must say. shall update when im super dooper free la.

chowz loyalties!

okay since fee said that her Ryan Ross is hot. i tell u Brendon Urie is hotter can!



my knees can go super weak when i see him pout his lips! jay look so much like him. now let me ask myself, i like brendon bcoz its brendon or because jay looks like him?

wakakaka!

the mystery will remain unfold. i tell u. i can go craayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyzie wit Brendon Urie. i want Brendon Urie can?

mummy, bump into him again. plz?!

apologies for the long time missing in action. shall update now. shall shorten the all-mighty-lengthy entry.

lets starts wit a day wit boyfie. for reference, boyfie- fayyadh. take note on that. particularly someone pointed out and asked to answer her the miseries that she went thru, wanting noe if we're serious or anything. well, like wat a fren said, let the heart lead everything. as for now, its the heart thats doin the stuffs. this useless soul is a total ridiculous. hopeless i tell u. very indecisive.

had a fine great date wit him. we decided to meet once a week. and apparently the last time that we met was on the v-day. i tell u, v-day this yr is so so so different. i receive no bouquet. i receive no flower. i receive no bracelet. but i receive a ring. from him la who else.

next its about my love. note now my love is known as heart. due to some unforeseen circumstances, i have to change the labelling. and as to avoid confusion, please do take note aite. now jay formerly known as my love, changed to heart. yeah. heart. so we went on a muvie date. we watched a very lousy movie at suntec. after that we had our late lunch cum early dinner. it was a nice one to one close experience. but no doubt we're still super dooper shy wit each other. and jz ytd we met again. he tagged along to lin's wedding. we have yet to take pictures together. soon i promise. the feelings just kept on growing....n growing...n growing.

after the date with heart, met didi to go to dayak's bday gathering. not many turned up. pity her. but its all good. we had a great time after all.

so i guess that wraps up the whole thang. not too detailed as i dun tink its necessary for me to pen down everything.

its the updating that matters most.

just note that, im still in a confusion state aite.

ouh one last thing! my latest possesion is BRENDON URIE! go figure who the hell is he.

its 12.55am ppl. wth??

k i cant sleep la apparently coz i dunnoe i guess im caught in the middle? well the besties must have known wat im talking about.

no doubt ive been smiling and feels chirpy ytd and tdy. the reasons are very well spotted. on thurs i met baby yadh at woodlands mrt. i swear i was damn freaking nervous. and i wasnt even prepared to meet him. i tot things gonna go haywired as soon as he saw me, but hell no i was wrong. the feelings in him just grew n grew and now im developing the same feelings towards him.

how? wat am i supposed to do? i am not supposed to feel this way. wat about my love jay? ive been patiently waiting for him and now things screwed up when baby yadh appeared. i tot this gonne be a play for a moment but its gonna be a soap drama for goodness sake. and im freaking scared that im gonna lose my love jay. it really made me happy getting a boyfren for myself like fayyadh but at the same time, i dun tink this is exactly wat i want for myself. im in dilemma. i shudnt have get myself involve in this stupid thing. im so in love wit two. i dun wan jay to noe bout this. he literally had showed me the signs which ive been waiting for ages, but y now? y onie now when yadh appeared? does he really testing my patience? but thats totally impossible.

ohh to whom i shud turn to? i noe things can never be okie as time goes by btwn me and fayyadh. i love his presence but i hate it when it comes with lots of restrictions. n to his parents, he is still a baby. imagine, 20 yrs old and have a curfew as early as 8. die rite? weekends strictly fr family and madrasah. i respect that kind of situations but he have to respect mine too. i admit i already develop the feelings fr him already. and im scared.

i felt sinful for not being truthful and honest to my love jay. ibu tried to coax me. she said wat makes me think that jay dun go out wit any other gerls. wit him who have the looks and everything in the world that a gerl can dream of. i just knew too well bout jay. he wont and i dun tink he will. as he wont have all the time in the world. even if he would, he will have told me and its onie goin to be his sec sch gf mates. i have no worries on dat honestly. but things are just getting topsy turvy now. ive never in my whole entire life lead myself to this kind of situation. and now its getting out of hand. well not really and i bet it will......anytime sooner.

just how can i get myself out from this. i noe i cant and i dun have any single hope in surviving. either one of them have to face rejections. and i have to think for future sake. and i have to think bout the security that i want. looks is totally out of point and the most important thing is the sincerity. fayyadh clearly shown. i dunnoe maybe i think we're still in the honeymoon period. but ive yet to see in jay. jay is being to secretive tts y. and he think and re-think to every single thing that he wanna say and do to me. just to make sure he din make one wrong move. he said one move and it can change all it off.

ouh im sooo terrified. love is such a pain in the ass~